


A Charmed Life

by KNACC



Category: Borderlands
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Other, Zaige as Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-07-15 13:49:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7224907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KNACC/pseuds/KNACC
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zer0's life comes to a screeching halt when against all odds, Gaige ends up pregnant and he needs to make another set of major life changes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Charmed Life

**Author's Note:**

> An anon on tumblr asked me to write Zaige kidfic and it turned out that I have a lot of thoughts about it so this story ended up being much longer than I expected. Think of this as basically an alternate, parent-y future for my Awkward Nerds in Love stories.

Zer0’s life had changed course several times over his life. At eighteen, he was just starting college and had no idea that in a few short years he’d be one of the most respected and feared assassins in the business. A month before he headed out to Pandora, a dull future filled with one disappointing job after another had seemed his inevitable fate. And now, only four years later, the perceived future filled with challenges, friends and Gaige comes to a screeching halt with just a few words.

“Zer0?” Gaige calls from the bathroom of their ship, her tone edged with worry, “Are you absolutely sure you’re sterile?”

“Yes?” Zer0 shouts, putting down his boken and heading towards her voice. “Why do you ask?”

Gaige is sitting on the toilet when he reaches the room, her eyes trained on a pregnancy test. She looks up when he knocks on the door frame, a sheepish expression on her face. "Oh, no reason,“ she chuckles, "except for the whole ‘I’m pregnant’ thing. Nothing to worry about.”

Zer0 freezes, his whole mind going blank with panic.

“Nono, don’t you fucking do that,” Gaige says, getting up and putting a hand on each of his arms in hopes of grounding him, “I’m the one that has a surprise miracle baby growing in me not you.”

Zer0 nods at this but doesn’t say anything, his brain still slowly rebooting after the shock.

Gaige sighs and waves a hand in front of his face, snapping her fingers as she does it. 

Zer0 blinks and shakes his head, finally looking down to meet her face. Now that she’s closer, he can see fear in her eyes, the mask of comedic nonchalance slipping away. His brain is still reeling but the anxiety on her face makes him put his hand on her cheek and run his thumb along it, almost like it’s instinct now. 

“Sorry,” she says, pushing her face into his hand, “I’m just really freaked right now so I need your help, okay?”

Zer0 nods. They stare at each other for a long moment and then he says out of nowhere, “We don’t need to keep it.”

Gaige eyes get wide and then she starts to laugh, a little manic. “Of course,” she chuckles out, “can’t believe I didn’t think of that.” Her eyes start to water and she wipes the tears away. "No real reason to panic because we don’t have to have the kid unless we want to.“

There’s a long silence where Zer0 wonders if this means everything is okay now before an important question comes to mind. "Do you… want to?”

“Do you?” Gaige shoots back immediately.

“I asked you first.”

Gaige frowns and sighs, her brow furrowing. “I'm… really not sure? When I was growing up, I always assumed I’d have kids someday, ya know? Like my parents.” Zer0 nods and Gaige continues, “I mean, my own childhood was so super rad, I figured once I was ready, I'd… pay it forward? or at least try my best to?” She shrugs. “But then the science fair happened, and then Pandora and then well… you,” she looks down and grins, “and I just assumed it wasn’t a thing I was going to do anymore.” She pauses and he thinks she’s maybe finally done when she adds, “Which I was totally okay with- believe me, I love our life together- it’s just… now that I’m actually pregnant with you highly improbable child, I don’t know, it’s just not so easy to not want it anymore, even though it’s still like totally impossible for people like us to be parents, right?”

Until this very moment, Zer0 can honestly say he’d never thought about having children. Gaige wasn’t wrong that it really didn’t suit their lifestyle and his memories of his own distant, unsupportive parents had done nothing to encourage thinking about it either. Now that he is thinking about it though, he realizes that he’d probably be an awful parent. He’s selfish, distant and cold, three things a caretaker shouldn’t be. But then again, before he’d met Gaige, he’d been sure that love was a waste of time and even if it wasn’t, that he’d be awful at it and neither of those had turned out to be true so maybe, he’ll be fine. And once he decides he wouldn’t be the worst parent ever, his mind starts making plans, trying to figure out the logistics of keeping this theoretical child safe and after a few moments he says, “I would need to die,” without really meaning to say anything out loud.

Gaige’s eyes get wide. "No fucking way, I’ll punch myself in uterus before I trade you-“

Zer0 blinks down at her and shakes his head. "Sorry, I misspoke/ I meant I must fake my death/ it’s the best option.”

“Ohh,” she considers it for a moment and then nods, “that makes sense.” She thinks about what he’s said again and then looks up at him with a stupid grin, “Wait, are you saying we can maybe… do this? Have a kid?”

“If you want to, yes,” he meets her eyes and smiles, “there will be much to prepare/ but it’s doable.”

“And you’re alright with how this will totally wreck your life? Kids are like a super huge commitment and once we do this, you won’t really be able to be all "lone renegade assassin with a death wish” anymore. You’ll have-“

"You think I don’t know?” Zer0 cuts her off, “It’s not the first time I’ve changed.” He looks down at her and smiles. “Some things are worth it.”

“Oh geez,” she says, blushing slightly before sticking out her tongue, “Fine, I get what you’re saying. I’m just…”

“Nervous?” he finishes her sentence. "So am I/ but we make a killer team/ so we should be fine.“

Gaige smiles and shakes her head. Zer0 picks her up and pulls her against his chest. 

"Alright, if you’re absolutely sure,” she says, leaning in to kiss him, “let’s have a baby!”

***

Life changes quickly after that. Once Zer0 wraps up a few of his more dangerous loose ends, it’s time to work on faking his death. It’s tricky but far from impossible and mostly involves putting a tall enough corpse in one of Zer0’s sneaking suits, filling that body with pints of Zer0’s blood that they’ve replicated and then making sure it “dies” in a believable but gruesome way all while the real Zer0 stealths away unscathed. 

They eventually decide he’ll “die” on a big group mission to kill the newest giant monster that’s terrorizing the countryside, partially because that way they’ll have more witnesses and partially because the monster should get a good chew on the corpse before any curious parties ever get to see it. They warn the other vault hunters about what’s going on but only because they all know about Zer0 and Gaige’s relationship and not cluing them in would have lead to them being far more worried about Gaige then she was willing to put up with, especially while pregnant. They all agree to play along and and once the foul beast is slain, they collectively retire to Moxxi’s to start commiserating their dead comrade. 

From that point on, the plan is for Zer0 to sequester himself on their ship until a few months after the baby is born and then reappear as a new, less secretive and less impressive vault hunter with new armor. It’s Zer0’s idea and while he knows that nearly a year without any jobs is going to drive him a little nuts, he can’t think of any better ways to assure that Zer0 the assassin and all the enemies he had are dead and gone for good. 

To fill the time, he trains, plays video games and most importantly, prepares for the baby. He starts out by learning the basics: what’s happening to Gaige’s body, what’s normal and what he should worry about and what sort of complications are possible. Some of this knowledge turns out to be a double edged sword though and he ends up spending most of the pregnancy following Gaige around (whether she’s up on his ship or down in Sanctuary) so he can keep an eye on her. It drives Gaige nuts but once she realizes that he’s just doing it because he’s worried, she mostly lets him be.

***

Zer0 absolutely refuses to trust Zed with their baby, so when the time comes for Gaige’s first prenatal appointment, he allows himself to escort her to the nice, fancy Eden-4 hospital where they’d found a suitable doctor in spite of the small risk they’ll be recognized and attacked. For Zer0, it’s a very small risk since his well known alter ego has been dead for a month and even without that, his face has never been tied directly to the assassin as no one but Gaige has ever seen “Zer0’s” face and lived. In the case of Gaige, it’s much more likely someone might recognize her, though nowadays she’s better known for being the head of a small nonprofit robotics security company and a part-time lecturer at the best robotics school in the galaxy than she is for the small bounty the lingering remnants of the Hyperion company has out for her. None of this actually makes Zer0 feel any better though so he spends most of the visit with his sword at the ready, his eyes scanning the hospital of threats.

“Is there something wrong with your husband, ma'am?” the receptionist asks as Gaige fills out the intake forms, Zer0 looming at her side.

“Partner, and he’s just like this,” Gaige says, her eyes never leaving the form she’s filling out. "More anxious than does anyone any good.“ 

"You really don’t need to worry, sir,” the receptionist says, and Zer0 ceases his constant scanning to turn and look at her, a sinking feeling in his gut telling him that they’re found out, that she’s a plant who knows exactly how much they are worth or has a grudge and that he’s going to have to kill her and all the witnesses and then wipe the security footage just to make sure her friends don’t have any evidence for how her job went bad. He’s reaching for his sword, ready to strike when she adds, “We’re not prejudice against cyborgs here even in the case of performance augments like yours or custom built mods like your partners. We understand that sometimes, cybernetics is the best option and even have engineers on staff to handle such situations.”

Zer0 lets his grip on his sword slacken. “Oh,” he blinks at her, wondering just what he should say. “T-thank you?”

The receptionist nods and goes back to her work. I guess that’s alright then, Zer0 thinks. Gaige bumps her hip against his thigh, looking up at him with a silent laugh before mouthing, “Chill out.”

Zer0 scowls down at her and she pulls on his shoulder so she can peck him on the lips before grinning and going back to her paperwork. He scoffs and goes back to scanning the perimeter for possible threats. Now is no time to let his guard down.

***

They’re most of the way back to that same hospital eight months later when Gaige’s water breaks a few days early. After a brief moment of panic where Zer0’s mind goes blank, he remembers that in his desire to be as prepared for this baby as possible, he had read up on home delivery techniques. He springs to action, rushing around the ship and grabbing the supplies he’ll need before coming back to the last spot he’d left Gaige only to find her no longer there. Instead, she’s sitting calmly on the hydraulic chair in her workshop with just a long t-shirt on, tinkering with some small project or another as she waits. 

Zer0 lets out an exasperated sigh and Gaige looks up and smiles at him sheepishly. "You know, I’ve read all the same baby books as you and they say that sometimes it takes hours after you water breaks for the contractions to really start coming so I thought-“

"Gaige-” Zer0 tries to cut her off but Gaige just keep talking.

“And this is the perfect room anyway: trays for tools, a sterilizing unit on hand, and this nifty chair,” she presses a button and the chair raises up a half an inch, “I’m right, right?”

Zer0 shakes his head and closes the last of the distance between them before pulling the small device she working on out of her hands and setting it aside with the rest of his supplies.

“Hey,” she says but he ignores her as he picks her up out of the chair and then sets her down on the one uncluttered part of the counter.

“You are right,” he says, refusing to look at her as he puts down towels on the chair. "But still/ let’s get everything prepared/ before we kill time.“

After a moment, he feels the weight of Gaige’s hand on his shoulder so he turns around to look at her. "I know this isn’t exactly what we planned but… you’re gonna do a fucking great job, you know that right?”

Zer0 frowns. "How can you be so calm?“

Gaige shrugs. "Cause you’re a perfectionist that read that book on home delivery like thirty times maybe? Also I may have taken some painkillers, so that might be mellowing me out a bit.”

Zer0’s eyebrows shoot up. “Which ones?”

“I double checked that they are okay for labor on the ECHOnet, I promise. Geez.”

Zer0 lets out another sigh and picks Gaige up and set her back down in the chair before thrusting the project she was working on her back into her hands. 

“Thanks,” she grins. “This is going to be for her be-te-dubs,” she says as she works away happily. "For now it’s just a little flying shield drone that summons automatically at the first sign of danger but I’m planning on making improvements as she grows up. You know, like DT except she’ll have him from birth so he can kinda… grow with her and stuff. Cool, right?“

Zer0 nods, his interest piqued by the idea but the adrenaline in his veins from the initial panic not really letting him focus at the moment. Instead of saying anything, he starts pacing.

Gaige glances up from her small robot and says, "I’ll tell you when the contractions starts, okay?”

Zer0 nods again and then Gaige starts talking, at first about her plans for this current robot and then about the next project she has lined up for her company and on and on, a gentle roll of intelligent chanter that in some places goes right over his head. And in spite of himself and his desire to be coiled and ready for when he needs to act, he finds himself calming down, if only a little bit.

They do end up needing to wait a few hours but once the labor really begins, Zer0 works like a well oiled machine, his anxiety totally dissipated by finally having the ability to act. Several hours and lots of screaming later, their daughter, Izanami, is born. The name was Zer0’s idea but Gaige took to it quickly due to finding the possible nickname of Izzy quite endearing. 

Once Zer0 does all the checks and makes sure she’s breathing properly, he wipes her down and hands her to Gaige, who is fussing nearby. And as he looks down at the two of them, an odd combination of fondness and terror comes over him. Because in spite of that fact that Izanami is literally a minutes old pile of flesh with no skills or personality to speak of, he loves her and wants to protect her and if that isn’t one of the scariest things that’s ever happen to him, he doesn’t know what is.

***

A few months after Izanami is born, Zer0 finally puts on his shiny new samurai themed armor and makes his return to Pandora as the new vault hunter, Hattori. After making sure to leave a rather obvious paper trail of travel records from one outer world to the next, he kisses Gaige goodbye and gets on a transport heading from Athenas to Pandora. It lands in the Dust and from there Zer0 heads out to the remains of Lynchwood to cause a bit of trouble and make a new name for himself. At first, Zer0 feels rusty in spite of all the practice he put in over the last ten months but after a few hours, he’s mostly back to his old self, each kill coming faster and easier than the last.

A few hours after he kills Groin Payne, the leader of the bandit clan squatting in Lynchwood, he gets an ECHO message from Maya inviting him to come to Sanctuary if he wants to use his skills to help people out. She’s in on the plan, all of the Vault Hunters are but she somehow manages to look disapproving and like she doesn’t quite trust him all the same. A few minutes after he echoes her back, Axton meets Zer0 at the Lynchwood fast travel and escorts him back to the city, putting in the coordinates to Sanctuary as if Zer0 doesn’t already know them.

It’s the first time he’s been back without being stealthed in nearly a year and it feels nice. People stare at him and whisper as they make their way to Crimson Raiders Headquarters, the news about a new vault hunter coming to town sure to spread quickly. 

“So this is it,” Axton says, gesturing around as they walk, “not a whole lot to look at but hey, it’s our home. Could be your home too if you decide to stick around.”

Zer0 tries not to grin as he responds, “I just might, if the work is interesting enough.” He cringes a little as the incorrect amount of syllables escapes his lips but the haikus were another thing that needed to go if he was going to present himself as a new person.

“Well, there shouldn’t be a problem there,” Axton chuckles and leads Zer0 through the door of the building and then up the stairs to where Maya is waiting. 

She’s in the middle of debriefing Salvador and Mordecai when she sees him, her mouth ticking up just slightly in a smile as she speaks. Salvador notices and turns around, his whole face lighting up when he sees Zer0. He closes the short distance quickly and without any preamble, wraps his arms around Zer0’s waist and picks him up in a bone crushing hug. 

“It’s so good to see you, amigo,” Sal says into his stomach. "You know for awhile there it was actually like you were dead.“

Zer0 glances down at the top of Salvador’s head before patting him there gingerly, unsure of what exactly he should say. He finally settles on, "It’s nice to see you too.” After another awkward moment, he adds, “But you are supposed to be pretending you don’t know me.”

“Oh right,” Salvador says, giving him one last squeeze before setting Zer0 back down. "I won’t do that again.“

"Thanks,” Zer0 says, readjusting his armor before looking around the room at the rest of the occupants. They’re all staring at him and smiling as well.

“Nice to see you back man,” Mordecai comes over and pats Zer0 on the arm.

Zer0 nods at him.

“So,” Maya says, shifting her hips as she speaks, “I was thinking we’d take our new recruit down to Moxxi’s and introduce him to the rest of the gang. Sound good to everyone?”

There’s a chorus of agreements from everyone in the room except Zer0 and Maya so they group up and head out.

The moment they’re outside of headquarters, Axton turns to Zer0 and says, “Hattori, right?”

Zer0 nods so he continues, “Don’t you want to take off your helmet? It’s going to make it awfully hard to eat if you leave it on.”

Zer0 grumbles under his breath but complies, knowing that it was only a matter of time before he’d have needed to do this anyway so as to continue distancing himself from whom he used to be. As he pulls his helmet off and goes to stow it away in his digistruct unit, Axton lets out a low whistle.

“Well damn,” he says, “You’re nearly as hot as your voice makes you sound.”

Zer0 feels his cheeks heat up as he scowls at Axton.

Salvador stops talking to Mordecai and looks up at Zer0, his eyes growing wide. “You’re not a robot.” His eyes shift over to Axton. "Time for you pay out, amigo.“

"No fucking way,” Axton shakes his head, “You’re the one who owns me. Fifty K, was it?”

Salvador is about to argue back but Maya sets a hand on his shoulder and says, “That’s an awful lot of money to be betting over a guy you just met.” She puts a lot of emphasis on the last two words as she glares at both of them. "Didn’t you mean more like… five hundred dollars?“

Axton grinds his teeth and frowns. "Yes. Right. But we all know Sal’s the one who owes me and not the other way around, right?”

“I’m pretty sure you’re the one who said he was a robot,” Sal counters.

They’re about to devolve into a full blown argument, Zer0 just knows it so he takes a deep breath and pulls off his glove, revealing the black metal muscles beneath before pulling the hand clean off. "So who wins now?“ he smirks, looking at both of them in turn.

The two of them stare, their eyes shifting back and forth between the hand and his face.

After a long silence only punctuated by Mordecai saying under his breath, "Fucking knew it, score”, Salvadore just shrugs. "Call it even?“

Axton shakes his head and sighs, "Fine, but we’re going to settle this later.”

“If you say so,” Salvador says, before turning conspiratorially to Zer0, “he’s not going to remember.”

Axton overhears that and calls back, “I sure as fuck will, you angry little square.”

Zer0 laughs as he reattaches his hand. He’d missed these people.

They reach Moxxi’s only to find nearly everyone already waiting for them. Brick and Krieg are playing with Anathema, taking turns tossing her up in the air before catching her to her infinite glee. Zer0 is a bit shocked by how big she’d gotten while he was away even after all the baby books he’s read. Lilith is holding the booth behind them, her expression perking up when she notices their group come in. They filter over to the booth, Maya pausing to catch Anathema mid-throw with her phase powers before gently pulling her into her arms and kissing Krieg hello.

“Again, mama,” Ana giggles.

“After dinner,” she agrees, kissing the child on the forehead and sitting down on one side of the booth.

Zer0 frowns slightly, worry about how Gaige and Izanami have been doing over the last week coming suddenly to the forefront of his mind. He brushes it aside though and slides into the other side of the booth, already mostly full with Lilith, Axton and Brick. The first thing they do is order their food and drinks with Zer0 hesitantly ordering a skag burger for himself and a small glass of sake. Their orders put in, the group gets to talking, their attention periodically switching over from each other to the “newest” member of their little group. Zer0 answers their questions as best he can, glad that he and Gaige had worked out a solid backstory for Hattori before they’d separated. 

It’s nearly a half an hour later and the food has just arrived when Gaige shows up, a tightly bundled Izanami in her arms. She has her hair pulled back in a loose ponytail and she’s wearing one of those low cut, off the shoulder kinds of tops that makes both breastfeeding and Zer0 playing with her boobs easier. The plan is for “Hattori” to be obviously smitten with Gaige and for the two of them to start dating so that Zer0 can more easily be a part of Gaige’s and Izanami’s lives. Conveniently for Zer0, his natural reaction to Gaige is to stare at her like she’s the best thing he’s ever seen and right now, it’s been a week since they’d last talked so he can barely keep his eyes off her. Gaige sees him starring on her way over and grins before trying to look like she hadn’t really noticed him at all.

“Hey everyone,” she shouts when she reaches their booth. 

“Gaige!” they all shout back except Krieg who shouts, “Flamehead and tiny meat bun,” instead.

“Sorry I’m late, Izzy was being a bit fussy,” she says, adjusting her hold on the baby. Zer0 wonders for a moment if it’s possible that Izanami had gotten sick while he was away but quickly discounts the idea as silly. There’s no way Gaige would have still taken her into public if that was the case. "Hey, new guy,“ Gaige says, looking down at Zer0 for the first time since she’d gotten to the table, "is this seat taken?” she says putting her knee on the open spot next to him.

“No,” he says, a stupid smile teasing the corners of his lips as he looks up at Gaige.

“Awesome,” Gaige says, plopping herself down right next to him. “So you’re the one who took on Groin Payne’s entire crew and won, eh?”

“Yes,” Zer0 nods.

“Good, we could use a few more badasses on our side, especially since I can’t be around to watch these guys backs what with this precious little bean around,” she says, making a silly face at Izanami.

“I’ll do my best.”

“You better,” she looks up at him, expression serious, “These guys are my family.”

Zer0 nods, at a complete loss as to what he should say next. Making small talk with Gaige as if he doesn’t know her is even harder than he expected. What do normal people say when they are hitting on women? "Do you… come here often?“ he tries.

Gaige has bite her bottom lip so as not to laugh. "I’ve lived here like five years now so yeah, I may come here a bit.”

“Oh, right,” Zer0 says, glancing away from Gaige and back to his food, cursing his lack of flirting skills. It’s a good thing he didn’t have to do this the first time or he’d have never ended up with Gaige in the first place.

Suddenly, he feels a warm weight on his upper thigh. He glances down to see that it’s Gaige’s hand, just gently resting there like it’s no big deal. She squeezes his thigh once quickly before pulling her hand away and he feels himself blushing again. He looks up to scold her only to find that she’s smiling and mouthing the word “drink” at him.

Oh, he thinks, of course. “May I buy you a drink?” he stutters out, far more nervous than he probably should be for someone trying to pick up their current partner.

“Sure, hat man. I’d like hot cocoa if Moxxi has any on hand.”

Zer0 nods and Gaige gets out of the booth so as to let him out. He makes his way up to the counter only to find Moxxi looking at him and shaking her head. "You’re pretty good looking sugar but you’re lucky Gaige has a weakness for tall, awkward guys or you wouldn’t have a chance.“

"Right,” he nods. "A hot chocolate please.“

"Already in the works,” she says, handing another patron a beer. "My advice-“ Zer0 opens his mouth to interrupt but she keeps talking, "whether you want it or not, is that she’s vault hunter, just like you, and not the sort of woman you win over with flowers and idle praise. If you just play it straight and try talking to her about things she likes like robots or guns, then maybe you’ll have a chance.” She hands him the cocoa as he reaches for his wallet, she says, “No thanks, sugar. This one is on the house. Gaige could use someone who’s going to treat her right. I just hope you’re them.”

“Thank you,” Zer0 says and heads back to Gaige with her cocoa. It smells like Moxxi made it just like she likes it too.

***

The next time Zer0 goes to Moxxi’s, he greeted with a grim stare and a request that he pay off his tab. When he assumes it’s some good natured hazing by Axton or Brick, Moxxi leans in close and says, “For your wake.”

Zer0 freezes on the spot, and then swallows as he meets Moxxi’s eyes.

“It wasn’t nice of you to make us mourn like that, sugar,” she whispers.

Zer0 sighs and stares her down. "It had to be done/ Izzy needed to be safe/ so I had to die.“

Moxxi frowns, then after a minute, shakes her head and sighs. "And I can’t fault you for that… but don’t you go doing it again, you hear? You have people who care about you.”

Zer0 nods, and as he goes to leave, Moxxi catches his wrist and squeezes. He tilts his head at her and then smiles and she lets go. When he leaves the bar a few hours later, he also leaves her an account number where she can get refunded for the wake.

***

Zer0 is pretty sure that Hattori leads a charmed life. He gets to spend his days doing jobs Maya or Lilith find, pushing himself to be his best and use his specialized skills for what they’re good for. Then at night, he hangs out with friends or works on wooing Gaige before finally sneaking into her apartment at the end of the night so he can spend more time with her and Izanami. It’s a good life but he can’t say he won’t be happier once he and Gaige are finally a believable item and he’s able to spend time with his girls whenever he wants.

It takes a month and several dates, but Gaige finally invites him back to her place publicly. From then on he spends more and more evenings at her place without having to sneak in until finally, it’s public knowledge that he lives there. When he walks through the streets, sometimes he overhears people talking about how he must be a doormat or an incredibly kind person or both to be willing to raise a child that isn’t his but he ignores them. People are stupid as they’ve ever been, he decides.

Izanami, for her part, grows up fast. She’s crawling at eight months, says her first word, Ze, at ten months, and before Zer0 knows it, she’s somehow managing to get into trouble in spite of how thoroughly the apartment and ship are both baby proofed. Gaige keeps making improvements to her robot as she grows and by the time she’s crawling around and getting into anything that’s not nailed down, the robot is able to keep up with her and help keep her safe. And in spite of his worries that she’ll somehow get hurt when he’s not there to look after her, Zer0 couldn’t be prouder of their inquisitive little baby and is absolutely sure that she’s a genius, just like her parents. 

***

It’s the five year anniversary of the day they figured out Gaige was pregnant with Izanami and Zer0’s just finished a three day mission and is on his way to pick her up from Sanctuary preschool. He takes off his helmet, runs a quick scan to make sure he doesn’t have any traces of blood on his armor and then walks into the school.

“Izzy will be out in a moment,” the teacher’s assistant says just as Izanami comes barreling out of the classroom and right into his arms.

“Ze!” she giggles as he picks her up, before wrapping her tiny arms around his neck a bit tighter than is actually comfortable.

“Thanks,” Zer0 nods at the assistant as he goes.

“Have a nice day,” she calls back.

“That was too long,” Izanami says the moment they’re out the door.

“School?” he says, watching her face for any clues to what she actually means.

She pouts and shakes her head. “No, you being away. It was too long.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Zer0 says, ruffling her red hair with his free hand as he walks them home. "I’ll try not to do that again.“

She pouts even bigger at him and he shakes his head at her. "Can I make it up to you by putting you up on the perch?”

Izanami nods so Zer0 sets her up on his shoulders with a, “Make sure to hold on.”

She giggles and wraps her arms around his forehead before shifting one of her arms down so that it is in front of his eyes. Zer0 just keeps on walking, his knowledge of the city and the way people move allowing him to keep going safely.

“Stop, Ze, you’re gonna crash!” Izanami says, but still doesn’t take her arm off his eyes.

Zer0 sticks out his arms and wanders back and forth a bit before bumping gently off a nearby wall. "Oh no Izanami, looks like you’re going to need to tell me where to go so we can get home to Mom.“

"No,” she says, finally moving her arm, “You can have your eyes back.”

“How kind of you,” Zer0 says, squeezing her legs where he’s already holding them.

“I’m the tallest,” she says and even though he can’t see her face right now, he can imagine how proud of herself she looks. They walk in silence for a few moments before Izanami asks, “When will I be like you and mom?”

Zer0’s not sure what she means so he answers, “You are already like us. What do you mean?”

She seems to consider his question for a minute before she says, “When do my hands come off?”

Zer0 starts to laugh, trying to think of a good way to explain himself as he does. He final stops laughing enough to say, “Our hands come off because we both got hurt and we fixed ourselves using robot parts like Tee. 

"Oh,” she says, “So you and mom are robots?”

“Sure,” Zer0 says, “close enough.”

A minute later, they’ve made it home. Izanami is resistant to the idea of getting off Zer0’s shoulders but she finally submits when he explains that she’s just too tall to fit through doors otherwise. Zer0 tries to hold her hand as they step through the door but the moment they’re inside she runs off, shouting, “Ze’s back, Ze’s back!” and looking for Gaige. She comes back moments later with Gaige in tow.

“You found him,” Gaige says, ruffling her hair. “Thanks for bringing him back to me.” She looks up at Zer0, and smiles. “How you doing, stranger?”

“Sorry,” he says, taking a step closer to her.

“Nah, don’t be,” she says, taking another step closer to him, “Three days just feels a hell of a lot longer than it used to, you know?”

“Yeah,” Zer0 says and closes the last of the distance between them before sweeping her up off her feet and into a kiss. 

She lets out a little gasp and for a moment they lose themselves to sensation.

“Mom, Mom, Mom,” Izanami says a minute later. 

Gaige pulls back and laughs a little while Zer0 sets her carefully back down. "What is it, Izzy?“ she asks as soon as her feet touch the ground.

"Ze says you are robots,” she says, eyes wide.

“Hell yeah we are,” she says, picking Izanami up and turning back to face Zer0, “What were you guys talking about?”

“She wanted to know when she was going to become a cyborg, so I told her the truth,” Zer0 shrugs.

“That she already is one, because she’s got Tee with her always?” Gaige squints at him over Izzy’s head.

“No,” Zer0 shakes his head, “Is that the right answer?”

“I am a robot too? Just like you and Ze?” Izanami says, looking back and forth between Zer0 and Gaige.

“Yup,” Gaige nods.

Zer0 chuckles and walks over, wrappings his arms around the two of them so that Izanami is sandwiched between them.

“We are a family after all.”


End file.
